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The Charles Bukowski poetry collection “Come On In!“ was published posthumously in 2006. The poem “Mind and Heart” is emblematic of the earnest and oftentimes moving poems found in this book.

Bukowski passed away, from leukemia, in 1994, and here he writes about his death, looking ahead to what it might be, wishing, unlike the average person, not to be surrounded by too many. This is fitting, since Bukowski didn’t like too many people around during his life, so why would that change at the end?

With any of the posthumous collections, the reader is left wondering, unfortunately, how much of Bukowski’s original work was edited with a possibly heavy hand, however. This was done even during his lifetime, by Black Sparrow Press publisher John Martin, who is credited with pulling Bukowski out of the US Post Office and into a fulltime writing career, but who also had tight strings tied to his output. Unlike most deals writers strike with their publishers, Martin found Bukowski when he was struggling and offered to pay him a flat fee every month if he kept writing.

The catch, however, being that he had to keep writing primarily for him. And what Martin did with that work has been controversial, both in terms of not publishing Bukowski’s constant stream of poetry in real time, for fear of flooding the market, and for editing out some of the more controversial and raw parts of the text and adding in his own florid language. You can read more about that here.

Mind and Heart, by Charles Bukowski

unaccountably we are alone
forever alone
and it was meant to be
that way,
it was never meant
to be any other way–
and when the death struggle
begins
the last thing I wish to see
is
a ring of human faces
hovering over me–
better just my old friends,
the walls of my self,
let only them be there.

 

I have been alone but seldom
lonely.
I have satisfied my thirst
at the well
of my self
and that wine was good,
the best I ever had,
and tonight
sitting
staring into the dark
I now finally understand
the dark and the
light and everything
in between.

 

peace of mind and heart
arrives
when we accept what
is:
having been
born into this
strange life
we must accept
the wasted gamble of our
days
and take some satisfaction in
the pleasure of
leaving it all
behind.

 

cry not for me.

 

grieve not for me.

 

read
what I’ve written
then
forget it
all.

 

drink from the well
of your self
and begin
again.

The poem “Mind and Heart” appears in the Charles Bukowski poetry collection “Come On In!“ Click the image for more information.

The way he phrases his wishes leaves one questioning if he even wanted anyone there, writing, “better just my old friends/the walls of my self/let only them be there.”

“The walls of my self” is a lovely, yet simple phrase that contains a closed-in feeling, but at the same time, a sense of wholeness, perhaps even acceptance as one moves on.

Bukowski, or the narrator, continues this theme, with a commonly quoted phrase derived from this poem: “I have satisfied my thirst/at the well/of my self/and that wine was good.” Bukowski had to go through a lot to accept himself, including an abusive and alienating childhood, and more to get the time and space to practice his craft. Looking back at that central achievement is fitting for a poem fixated on one’s own passing. Again, it brings light to what some might consider a dark topic.

Yet as the speaker continues, he encourages the reader to not dwell in his example too seriously, but rather to take in what he has shared, but also to cast it aside, to “forget it,” in the grand pleasure of “leaving it all behind.”

Importantly, at the poem’s close, you realize this is something of a passing of the torch poem, a motivational poem, even. Bukowski is encouraging the reader to take his example to blaze their own path forward, to: “drink from the well/of your self/and begin/again.”

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